最近，央視熱播劇《我的後半生》一度登上話題熱榜，頻頻引發全網熱議。故事的開始，已經退休的文學系教授沈卓然，兒女雙全、三代同堂，原本過著令周圍人羨慕的退休生活。可老伴的突然離世，打破了過往的歲月靜好，讓老沈陷入了悲痛之中無法自拔，自此鬱鬱寡歡，整日活在消沉之中，生活也因此發生了巨大改變。為了能讓老沈早日走出痛苦，他的老友和兒女都建議他重新找個老伴兒，就這樣70歲的老沈開啟了“相親之路”。由於他擁有過萬的退休金，住著一套近兩百平的房子，不僅生活條件優渥，自身還頗具文采，相親的開始，就引起了很多中老年人的注意。Later, Lao Shen gained several twilight loves and met all kinds of people, but each relationship eventually ended because of various inconsistencies.Now, this drama has ushered in the finale, and at the end of the story, Lao Shen decided to move to a nursing home to live, so that he could accompany his sick old friends while spending his old age happily in the things he loved. In the eyes of others, he experienced widowhood and faced the end of several fates, and seemed destined to die alone. In fact, Lao Shen has learned to reconcile with loneliness after several separations, and is no longer obsessed with remarriage, but has found the most suitable way for his retirement. He told his children: "I used to be afraid of old age and loneliness, and I was always looking for support. This man, if you are good, everything will be fine. ”That's true. When people are old, if the wife takes the first step, instead of blindly remarrying, it is better to try these 3 ways to live and manage your old age.
白岩松在一場演講中，談到一個觀點：“養老不容易，儲蓄健康比儲蓄金錢更重要。”隨後他舉了一個很現實的例子：當一個人健康受損，身體各項機能變差，隨著年齡增大，就容易反覆生病。若是六十歲起就開始頻繁住院，需要依靠治療維持生命，一直到85歲，這25年會經歷多麼難熬的過程。這些話聽起來殘酷，但卻是很多人不得不面對的現實。人在年輕時，總以為只要積攢了足夠多的錢，生活條件足夠好，未來就會避開一切風雨，免去老年苦，免自己無枝可依。可到了一定年齡就會明白：若是失去了健康，不管是身體上還是心理上的，幸福指數就會隨之大大降低，即便擁有再多的財富也難以填補健康的空缺。《我的後半生》中，有這樣扎心一幕，不少網友看完後直呼太心酸。聶老師博學多識，和沈教授一見如故，從興趣愛好到人生觀，總有聊不完的話題，彼此都收穫了一段幸福時光。誰曾想，聶老師突然癌症復發，暈倒在家，幸好被人及時發現送去了醫院。聶老師病情惡化后，老友們緊急尋找她的親人過來照料，可她唯一的兒子卻遠在國外，打了數通電話都聯繫不上。一邊要面對疾病的困擾，一邊是無依無靠的現狀，聶老師心中的酸楚不言而喻。
It is precisely because of the anxiety of health problems that it brought gusts of rain to her originally peaceful life, and the happy old age she once envisioned was disrupted in this way. Warren Buffett has a very profound saying:
"If I give you a car, and it's the only one in your life, you take very good care of it, you fix any scratches, and you read the manual, etc.
In the same way you only have a body and a brain, you can't wait until you're older to start taking care of them, by that time, you've probably overused them. ”
Health is the foundation of everything.
Don't wait until you're old to lie in a hospital bed before you start to regret that you've overdrawn your body and don't take good care of your health. Don't wait until you need to rely on medication to maintain various functions before you realize the importance of living a regular life and developing good habits.In daily life, firmly hold these 1 keys and be kind to the rest of your life: (0) Insist on moderate exercise and rebuild your vitality:You don't have to pursue high-intensity exercise, and taking a walk in the park every day after dinner or in the morning is also a gentle awakening to your body's functions. Tai Chi, one move and one style, can also enhance muscle strength and improve the body's balance. Occasionally, I also participate in the senior fitness organized by the community, and dance with my peers in a cheerful rhythm, which not only exercises the body, but also gains happiness and friendship.(2) Regular rhythm of life, learn to enrich the body and mind:Studies have shown that a good night's sleep can help boost immunity, boost metabolism, and also reduce anxiety and stress. Urging yourself to go to bed early, quit smoking and limit alcohol, and maintain a balanced diet can also reduce the risk of some diseases.(3) Regular and comprehensive physical examination to find problems in time:How many people regret a minor illness because it has become a major illness, causing lifelong regrets to themselves. Make a plan every year to take time out for a physical examination, keep abreast of your physical condition, discover potential health problems, and adjust your eating habits and lifestyle in time to avoid small problems from becoming big pains. Take advantage of the good years, manage your health, save the most critical capital, and leave the most valuable wealth for the golden years.
Esthetician Zhu Guangqian once said:
"People have to be interesting in order to be alive.
Vitality is the happiness experienced in life, and vitality is the power needed to carry forward life. ”
True. No matter what age a person is, only by keeping love in his heart and having the motivation to grow towards the sun can he make life wonderful.
對於大多數中老年人而言，培養一些適合自己的興趣愛好，就是充實生活的關鍵所在。《我的後半生》中，為人熱情爽朗的呂原被很多人稱為“高能量天花板”，活出了不少人羨慕的模樣。六十歲的她，無論經歷什麼事，始終保持超強的生命力，時常能感染到身邊人。
早晨六點，她就能準備好豐盛的早餐，隔三差五還會變著花樣的研究美食。吃完早餐後，她就開始收拾屋子，擦窗戶、拖地、整理衣服鞋子，好像永遠感覺不到累，對待每件事都幹勁滿滿。和老沈相處的過程中，她還會不停引導對方，帶著老沈飯後遛彎，閑暇時踢毽子鍛煉身體，主打一個不服老。旁人眼中耗時耗力的家務、勞動、鍛煉等，在呂原看來都是豐富生活的法寶，也是哄自己開心的源泉。她每天掛在嘴邊的口頭禪通常都是：“人呐，不能悲觀，活著就要積極，積極就有辦法。”一開始她因為欣賞老沈，想與其結為夫婦，但最後發覺兩人確實不適合，也不再糾纏，而是回到原來的節奏里，繼續發著屬於自己的光。活得通透的人，都不會在不值得的感情中留有太深執念，她們始終懂得走好自己的路，有所熱愛，就能收穫無限光亮。呂原的絕佳狀態，讓我想起86歲的老戲骨吳彥姝，因為有著極強的親和力，被大家讚為“國民奶奶”。年近九十的她，在採訪時坦言稱，自己現在能跑能跳，還能打籃球，從不會被年齡束縛。平日里，她還會學習插花、健身、學著運用各種工具等，每天把生活排的充實且自在。有人感慨，結了婚就沒有培養愛好的機會了。對此她表示：“別為任何人而活，人要為自己活著，想吃什麼就吃，想玩什麼就玩.....”有人曾問她：“你都八十多了還出來演戲，孩子真不孝.....”她笑著回應：“人每天坐在家裡真的會很枯燥，必須要有自己熱愛的事物，演戲也好，去老年大學學畫畫也好，有所追求就是最好。”
Having something to do, looking forward to it, being busy and having fun, in fact, is the best state in old age. Enriching one's hobbies and enriching one's life are like bright stars that will light the way forward.On the way to get old, you might as well try to cultivate these types of hobbies and hobbies to nourish your soul: (1) Culture and art, self-cultivation, and cultivation:Reading can broaden cognition; Writing, you can record your feelings; painting, which can help to calm the mind; Music can relieve stress. Every time you start, you can rejuvenate your spiritual world.(2) Life practice, use your hands and brains, and enjoy your achievements:Try to do some hand-knitting, etc., or learn photography and make short videos, which can not only make good memories, but also have a new sense of accomplishment.(3) Social exploration, go out of the house and broaden your horizons:In your spare time, you can go hiking or traveling with old friends, participate in some social activities, and your body and mind will be comfortable. In the long run, not only will the spirit become more and more full, but people will no longer be dimmed by the passage of time.
Zhou Guoping once described in the book the three states that gradually change when people are alone: at first, they are panicked, clueless, unable to calm down, and bent on escaping from loneliness. Later, I got used to loneliness, calmed down, and did all kinds of things to expel loneliness. When you are fully mature, turn 'loneliness' into an opportunity to create, learn to get along with yourself in an environment where no one disturbs, and then trigger deeper thinking and experience about life and self. In "The Second Half of My Life", as the story progresses, Lao Shen's mood gradually undergoes similar changes.
In the days when his wife first left, he couldn't let go, immersed in pain, and felt uneasy because he was unaccompanied. Later, although he met new friends and integrated into a new circle, he still panicked about the future pension problem. It wasn't until he gradually separated from several blind dates and experienced the death of his best friend that he finally understood: instead of waiting for "who will accompany me", it is better to "accompany myself".Learning to be alone is one of the compulsory lessons in life; Enjoying solitude is the beginning of a person's maturity.When people are young, they always feel that having more friends, a bigger circle, and constant meals are the foundation of fulfilling life. When you have seen too many complex human feelings and witnessed too many people coming and going, you will one day understand that a comfortable life starts from a quiet life. When you get away from the circle that makes you strenuous and reduce unnecessary human interactions, you can live your true self.In the second half of your life, take care of your relationships and set aside enough time for yourself to listen to your inner voice and understand the real needs of your later life.
(1) Cultivate your mind in solitude and sort out your uneasy emotions:Through meditation, focus your attention on your breath and breathe in and out to calm your mind. You can also pour out your inner thoughts in a diary, and when your inner troubles are concretized, you will find that they do not seem to be so difficult to face.(2) In the quiet time, do a good job of life and give up:In your spare time, you can tidy up the old items that are idle at home, and at the same time, you can clean up the house and make your heart clear and bright.(3) Clear the zero that should be cleared, and stabilize your kernel:The key to coping with the changes of the years is to clear all the glory and loss of the past, not to let the past achievements become the shackles that imprison the present, so that people can rest on their laurels and stabilize their own core. When people reach their old age, they don't have to invite everyone into their lives, and they can leave a piece of purity in their lives, so that their hearts can be at peace.
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I agree with one point of view:
"The best old age is not to find someone to be a companion, but to live your own fullness."
After the death of my wife, learning to clear my mind as soon as possible and face life seriously is the best attitude towards life.In the journey of life, when you are no longer obsessed with finding candles to illuminate yourself, but know how to heal yourself, you will see the starry sky. Light up the "love" at the end of the article and encourage your friends.