In the process of parenting, every parent will inevitably feel anxious and confused:

Is the child's emotional control healthy?

Will they develop deeper emotional problems because of a small fluctuation in their lives?

Especially in this fast-paced and stressful society, children's emotions seem to be more and more vulnerable, not only because of academic pressure, but also because of the confusion, emotional swings and interpersonal conflicts in the process of growing up.

As parents, we should not only pay attention to our children's physical health and academic performance, but also pay attention to their emotional growth, helping them maintain inner peace and stability in a complex world.

In fact, emotional education is a gradual process, which begins to cultivate children at a very young age, and parents' responses often determine the direction of children's emotions.

When a child's mood swings, if parents can respond in a timely and effective manner, this emotion can be better regulated.

A child's emotional growth requires understanding and acceptance, and this often requires only a few simple but meaningful words.

They can not only build a bridge of communication between parents and children, but also help children find a stable channel in the emotional world.

01 Recognition and acceptance of emotions

I have always believed that the first step in emotional education is to help children recognize and accept their emotions.

When faced with their children's emotions, the easiest response for parents is to ask them to "calm down" or ask them to "bear with it".

This reaction, while well-intentioned, often ignores the child's true feelings.

Anger, anxiety, and sadness are often the true expression of children's emotions, and our task is to make them understand these emotions, not suppress them.

"I feel your feelings, do you want to talk?"

This sentence brings children not only comfort and gentleness, but also recognition and understanding.

When parents ask in a calm and concerned tone, children can feel that their emotions are accepted, that they are not making trouble, and that emotions are not something that cannot be expressed.

Through such conversations, children learn to recognize and express emotions instead of suppressing them in the depths of their hearts.

Gradually, they will become better at expressing their emotions and learn to regulate and release emotions within a healthy framework.

I'll give you an example. My little niece sometimes feels anxious because of her bad grades, knowing that she has done her best, but she is still not satisfied with her grades, and her heart is full of anxiety and self-doubt.

That's when I would walk over to her and gently say to her, "Can I feel that you're a little anxious right now, and want to tell me what's going on?" ”

This kind of inquiry gives her the space to talk and makes me a listener of her emotions.

She began to slowly express her fears and uneasiness, and after a few exchanges, her emotions were relieved, and the burden on her heart seemed to be much lighter.

In this way, she learned how to recognize and regulate her emotions instead of letting them flood uncontrollably.

02 Facing difficulties together

Children's emotional problems often come from their feelings of helplessness in the face of difficulties.

Whether it's academic frustration or confusion in making friends, children often feel powerless in the face of pressure.

This sense of powerlessness is easy to make them anxious, depressed and even angry, and the parent's sentence "Let's find a way to solve it together" has become a lifesaver for children's emotions.

I remember one time, when my little nephew was depressed because of his unsatisfactory test results, he said in a depressed mood: "I did so badly that I may never have a chance to get better." ”

I walked over, patted him lightly on the shoulder, and said softly, "Don't worry, let's take a look at the questions of this exam together and find out where we can improve, okay?" ”

The child was stunned, then nodded, flipped through the test paper with me, and began to analyze the mistakes.

In the process, he gradually came out of depression and regained his motivation and confidence to learn.

Behind this sentence, it is not only encouragement, but also a plan of action.

Parents do not need to solve all problems for their children, but through companionship and guidance, let children see the possibility and hope of solving problems.

By facing challenges together, children not only learn how to cope with difficulties, but also feel the support and companionship of their parents, and feel that they are not alone.

This kind of emotional support can effectively regulate children's emotions and make them see the motivation to move forward from the predicament.

03 Emotional affirmation and encouragement

In the process of children's growth, emotional affirmation is extremely important.

Every child craves the approval and praise of their parents, and this recognition can bring great confidence and inner comfort to the child.

Especially when children are experiencing mood swings, a simple "you did a great job, I'm proud of you" can instantly dissolve their self-doubt and make them regain the courage to face the challenges ahead.

Here's an example.

My little nephew participated in a math competition last year and although he didn't win in the end, I am very proud of his hard work and dedication in the competition.

He smiled when he saw that I wasn't disappointed that he didn't win the award.

I patted him on the shoulder and said sincerely, "You've done a great job, and I'm proud of you no matter what the outcome is." ”

At that moment, his eyes lit up, and all the exhaustion and frustration seemed to disappear.

This emotional affirmation made him know that the love and support of his parents did not depend on the results, but on the efforts he put in.

And this kind of recognition can help children no longer fall into self-denial in the face of failure, but learn to draw strength from failure.

Therefore, helping children manage their emotions is not achieved overnight, it requires patience, wisdom and companionship from parents.

The core of emotional education is to teach children how to recognize and accept their emotions, and there is no fixed pattern for this process.

Emotional fluctuations are part of a child's development, and what we need to do as parents is not to forcibly suppress these emotions, but to learn to give our children understanding, support and guidance at the right moments.

Through simple but meaningful words, we can help children identify, express and regulate their emotions, so that they can better understand how to make peace with their emotions as they grow.

Proofread by Zhuang Wu