Have you noticed? , some children grow up and their mothers are always close to each other? In fact, this estrangement did not come out of nowhere, the seeds were planted as early as childhood. Psychological research has shown that the quality of parent-child relationships is often set before the child is 6 years old.

1. Eye contact is pitiful

Babies seek their mother's eyes from birth, which is the most primitive attachment behavior of humans. However, some babies rarely make eye contact with their mothers, or even deliberately avoid eye contact. This avoidance is not shyness, but a sign of problems in early attachment relationships. When children are reluctant to give even the most basic eye contact to their mothers, it is naturally difficult to establish intimacy when they grow up.

2. Physical contact is like "electric shock"

Healthy children will instinctively seek their mother's arms and touches. But some children stiffen when they are held, trying to break free as if they were electrocuted; Or never take the initiative to snuggle up to your mom. This resistance to physical contact is a reflection of the child's inner insecurity and inability to get comfort from the mother.

3. Emotional expression like "dumb"

A normally developed child will show his mom a variety of emotions – laughing when he is happy and crying when he is sad. But some children are "emotionally dumb" when facing their mothers, barely expressing any feelings. This emotional isolation is a way for children to protect themselves, indicating that they do not think that their mother understands or accepts their emotions.

4. There are no waves when separating

Most toddlers exhibit anxiety when separated from their mothers, which is a sign of healthy attachment. But some children are unresponsive when their mother leaves and don't greet them when they return, as if their mother's presence or absence doesn't matter. This unusual calmness is actually that the child has given up on his mother's expectations.

5. There is almost zero imitation behavior

Children learn and bond by imitating their mothers. From babbling to behaving, a healthy child will copy their mother in large numbers. But estranged children rarely imitate their mothers, and they prefer to imitate other family members or TV characters, which shows that mothers lack influence in their hearts.

How to repair an estranged parent-child relationship

15. At least 0 minutes of "exclusive time" every day - put down the mobile phone and concentrate on doing what the child likes

2. Learn "emotion translation" skills – help children identify and express feelings, such as "You look a little disappointed"

3. Increase appropriate physical contact – start with simple high-fives and hugs, and gradually build physical trust

4. Create shared memories – do special little rituals on a regular basis, such as "Homemade Pizza Night" on Fridays

5. Avoid over-control – Give your child proper autonomy and make him feel respected

The parent-child relationship is like a bank account, every warm interaction when I was a child is saving money, and indifference and neglect are withdrawing money. When the account balance is insufficient, estrangement becomes inevitable. But the good news is that with patience and sincerity, it is possible for a parent-child relationship at any age to be repaired.

Tips: The medical science knowledge in the content is for reference only, does not constitute a medication guideline, does not serve as a basis for diagnosis, do not do it yourself without medical qualifications, if you feel unwell, please go to the hospital in time.