Transfer Secret: Start by stopping self-attack and unlock a new chapter in your life

In the journey of life, everyone will encounter storms and challenges, but many times, the real enemy is not external pressure, but inner self-condemnation. Writer Zhou Muzi once profoundly pointed out: "80% of the troubles in life come from the denial of self. "When we learn to stop attacking ourselves and turn to self-affirmation, we often find that the turn of fate has inadvertently and quietly arrived.

1. Stop excessive introspection and release the burden of your heart

There is a term in psychology called "rumination thinking", which refers to the fact that after experiencing a setback, an individual will repeatedly recall the situation at that time, which can exacerbate negative emotions. This state of mind is not uncommon in reality.

For example, an editor of self-mediaFriends have shared his experience. In one editAt work, he felt guilty of a mistake in the title. Although this mistake did not bring losses to the official account, but caused interaction with readers, and the boss also advocated the team to learn from it, he has always been unable to let go. Every time he recalls this mistake, the feeling of self-blame will come back to his heart, which seriously affects his work status and interpersonal relationships.

This phenomenon of excessive introspection is especially common in fast-paced lives. We are accustomed to looking at ourselves with a magnifying glass, worrying about what we say or do inappropriately in social situations, and blaming ourselves for not trying hard enough when we fail. However, the greatest suffering in life is to embarrass oneself and find no way to forgive oneself. As the saying goes, "A life without reflection is not worth living; But there is no way to live a life of excessive introspection. ”

So, instead of flooding your mind with worries, learn to accept yourself as you are. Only by releasing the burden of our hearts can we travel lightly, bravely meet every challenge, and embrace every possibility.

2. Eliminate perfectionism and accept one's own shortcomings

In "A Date with Luyu", psychologist Wu Zhihong once said frankly: "If you demand perfection, it means that you are constantly and never stopping attacking yourself, because you are not perfect." This persistent pursuit of perfection often brings great psychological pressure to oneself.

Lin Feng is a talented architect known for his extreme pursuit of work. However, this obsession with perfection gradually bound him. He was almost harsh on his works, repeatedly scrutinizing and revising, and although he won high praise, he also endured great psychological pressure. Eventually, he had to seek psychotherapy.

Lin Feng's story is not unique. In real life, how many people are like him, who are extremely strict with themselves and want to try their best to be flawless in everything. The slightest mistake can lead to intense self-criticism. In this environment of constant pressure, their mental state is like a spring that is stretched to the limit, and it can get out of control at any time.

So, when we're feeling stressed, we might as well stop and embrace our shortcomings. As Hayao Miyazaki said, "It's okay if it's not perfect, everything has cracks, and that's where the light comes in." "Only by accepting one's imperfections can we navigate life with ease.

3. Restraint and comparison, focusing on self-growth

Brad, the protagonist of the movie "Brad's Midlife Crisis", originally had a comfortable life, but after a class reunion, his heart changed drastically. Seeing that his former classmates had achieved great things while he seemed to be stagnant, he began to unconsciously compare his life with theirs. Far from bringing him any psychological comfort, this comparison turned his life into chaos.

In real life, this comparative psychology is equally prevalent. Office workers aspire to the freedom of freelancing, but are unaware of the economic ups and downs they face; Singles crave the company of married people, but they also want to have their own space. True happiness, however, does not lie in comparison with others, but in identifying with oneself.

Writer Lin Qingxuan once said: "Compared with superior people, we feel inferior; Comparing ourselves with the laity makes us obscene; Compare ourselves with those who are inferior to us, and make us proud. "The many troubles of life are not terrible, but what is terrible is to fall into the black hole of comparison and cannot extricate themselves. When we learn to refrain from comparing psychology and appreciate our strengths more, we can accumulate inner strength and reap inner peace.

4. The Power of Self-Affirmation: Unraveling a New Chapter in Life

The beginning of a person's transfer often begins with stopping giving themselves a bad review. When we learn to stop excessive introspection, break away from perfectionism, and refrain from comparison, we will find ourselves gradually moving towards a new stage.

Stop over-introspectionIt means that we must learn to accept our own shortcomings and no longer look at ourselves with a magnifying glass. Think more about the good, and life can go up and down.

Destroy perfectionismIt is to give yourself a certain margin for error and allow yourself to make mistakes and fail. Only in this way can we live a relaxed life without being constrained by pressure.

Restraint is more psychologicalIt is to focus on self-growth and no longer blindly envy others. True happiness lies in self-recognition and contentment, not in comparison with others.

When we loosen our spirits, the higher the energy will naturally be, and the better the luck will be. Just as flowers bloom and fall, life also has its own ups and downs. Learn to change your mind in order to achieve good luck.

Conclusion: Self-improvement in setbacks and self-improvement in life

Life is long, and everyone will experience and grow in setbacks. Transshipment is not something that can be achieved overnight, but requires continuous effort and self-adjustment. In this process, we must learn to stop self-attack and release the burden of our hearts; Break away from perfectionism and accept your own shortcomings; Restraint is more psychological, focusing on self-growth.

When we learn this, we will find that our mindset becomes more peaceful and confident. And this change in mentality is the beginning of our transshipment. May we all be self-reliant in setbacks, self-overcome in life, be our own supporters, and welcome a better future.