The biggest failure of a family is not poverty, but raising children who are cowardly, timid, and fearful.

Being cowardly, timid, and afraid of things is not the way to survive, but it will hinder the development of life.

The so-called "people are good at being bullied, and horses are good at being ridden". If you are a little cowardly, you will be bullied, let alone start from scratch and go to work to make money.

Parents want their children to be self-reliant and even reach the pinnacle of life. But I forgot that a cowardly child actually has no future.

Ironically, countless parents are raising children with cowardly personalities. It's not that they want their children to be cowardly, it's that they're unintentionally making them cowardly.

Families with these characteristics are raising children with cowardly personalities.

1. Families with a strong desire to control are raising children with cowardly personalities.

There is nothing that ruins a child's life, or casts a shadow on his child's life, than the parent's desire to control.

Countless parents think that if I have a child, the child is my appendage, so they should be obedient. If they are disobedient, they are unfilial sons who thunder and thunder.

This idea that "children should be obedient" just reflects the strong desire of parents to control.

Imagine, the child has been obedient since he was a child, so isn't what he has created is a sheep-like character? And the sheep-like personality tends to be cowardly, timid, and afraid?

There is actually a contradiction between the parents' desire to control and the shaping of their children's personalities. The stronger the desire to control, the more cowardly the child's personality becomes; The weaker the desire to control, the more bold and confident the child's personality will be.

The latter is more conducive to doing things from scratch. After all, what this society needs is not young people who are as timid as sheep, but young people who are bold enough to do things.

Second, families full of quarrels and scolding are raising cowardly children.

What kind of family of origin is the worst? There is no doubt that it is the quarrelsome family of origin.

The husband and wife are quarreling every day, either today is a cold war, or tomorrow is fighting, so what do you think the children who have been looking at it since childhood will have their hearts?

Just one word, afraid. They are afraid of their parents' quarrels, of their parents' domestic violence, and of their parents venting their grievances on them. To live with such trepidation will create a cowardly character.

Of course, countless parents do not recognize this problem and still think that it is normal to quarrel all day long. As everyone knows, this is not normal, but harmful.

When the child grows up, both parents should live in harmony. Don't have too much scolding for your child. If you beat too much and scold too much, people will become wood.

It's like a child of wood, when someone kicks it, they move. In this way, it is equivalent to "waste". When you work hard in society, it is difficult to even make money to support yourself. It's sad.

3. Honest families are raising children with cowardly personalities.

Su Shi said that loyalty has been passed down to the family for a long time, and poetry and books have been passed down for a long time.

Many people understand "loyalty" as being honest, even if they are slaughtered by others, they can't resist. This is a misunderstanding.

True loyalty, first of all, adhere to the principle of a gentleman, people do not offend me, I do not offend others; Secondly, it is to adhere to the principle of integrity, you tell me integrity, I will talk to you about integrity, integrity is mutual.

What is Gentleman?A combination of rigidity and softness is a gentleman.There is only rigidity, but not softness, that is recklessness; There is only softness, but no rigidity, that is the waste wood that can be slaughtered.

so-called"Too rigid and easy to break, too soft and easy to waste"That's it. Whether it is rigid or soft, we should not go to extremes, but should be "neutralized" together, both rigid and soft.

People, you can be moderately honest, but you must not be overly honest. Hang on"If anyone does not offend me, I will not offend, but if anyone offends me, I will offend"The principle is the truth of living in the world.

Fourth, families with a strong domestication culture are raising cowardly children.

How are obedient slaves trained? Just one word, tame.

There is a management saying,Hu Hu Hu is a big stick.Humans tame the donkey, first beating it to make it fearful, and then giving it a carrot to feed it. In this way, it obediently obeys.

If you give it a carrot and don't beat it, it won't be obedient; If you beat it up and don't give it a carrot, it will starve to death and may become wild.

Only by beating it first and then giving it a carrot will not only make it fearful, but also satisfy its most basic food needs, so it will obediently obey in order to survive.

As long as you look closely, you will find that countless families and parents are "taming" their children in a similar way. And don't their children live like donkeys?

The children cultivated by "tame education" are not people with complete personalities, but cows and horses with cowardly personalities and fearful personalities.Becoming cattle and horses turned out to be their inevitable fate. It's ironic.